Cancer

I hate cancer.

Today is one of those days. One of the days when my mind continues to go back to the place I was in 4.5 years ago.

I took the day off work, not for a day of leisure but very much the contrary.  After dropping the kids off at Martha’s and before my day got started I decided to treat myself to breakfast from Starbucks, sitting on the couch and watching one of my favorite shows disruption free. That's kinda like a vacation on its own. I turned on The Little Couple. Just so happens its the episode when Jen was diagnosed with cancer and she's going through her chemotherapy. I cried watching her. I cried thinking about JUST welcoming home an adoptive baby and not being able to fully be THERE for the kids and family. Having to force yourself to solely think about your health and treatment and miss out on some special moments with your kids. Makes my stomach hurt with memories. Jen’s positivity throughout her treatment was so awesome to watch….and it reminded me of the way our family got through our fight 4 years ago.

And While I was sitting in line at starbucks it dawned on me that this time 4 years ago (well actually yesterday 4 years ago) we were celebrating….like REALLY celebrating! I think it was the biggest celebrations of our life…other than our wedding. It was my “Post Chemo Bash”. We gathered at the Sons of Italy in Fontana with family and friends…to celebrate my treatments being over. No more chemo, no more radiation.  I had an AMAZING support system while I was sick…and being able to chat, drink, dance and relax with all those that showed their love was awesome. It was a brilliant night!

March 19th, 2010

Looking back at these pictures is crazy. I had such amazing support…Thank you all…We are blessed with such amazing friends!

But it saddens me that today I had to attend a funeral where a friend of mine WASN’T so lucky to be able to celebrate health like I did …she lost her battle to cancer.

 

I met Robyn a few years ago…I had her son in my online health class. He was kind of a slacker and his grade was reflecting that…and when I met her at a bunco gathering she wanted to know the ins and outs of my class. Talk about pressure. So we became friends through a bunco group that I made guest appearances at. haha Actually I’m friends with Taryn who is really IN the group…and I just tag along when dates work out for me.  Years later I had Robyns daughter in my class…and thats when I got to know her better. I saw the side of her that was so devoted to her children. She was such a great mom and advocate!!


me, Robyn, Taryn and Brenda
This was at a bunco party in September…might have been Robyns last. She was going through chemo and radiation at this point…and looked great huh!?!? We came together that night, played and had a good time. There were no winners at this particular bunco night…all the money went to Robyn to get her son, who is a freshman in college in New York, a flight home for Thanksgiving! She cried, we cried…

Anyway…Robyn was diagnosed mid-late last year with lung cancer. Very depressing considering she never smoked a day in her life. Growing up with asthma and bronchitis issues…she had developed a cough that wouldn’t go away. She went to the doctor when she started having rib pain from all the coughing. She did chemo, radiation but this cancer was spreading faster than the chemo was killing it. Only 47 years old…way to young! 

So days like these make me sad. As I watched her husband and kids say their final goodbyes my heart broke…I thanked God for my health and prayed that He comfort them during this very difficult time!

Why must Cancer exist?? What can we do to figure out a cure for this? I’m over it!