Only Child Expiring Feb 2013

We had a little photo shoot today…and I just HAVE to share…!!

SOMEONE is excited to be a big brother!!! heehee.

My friends, both Heather and Erika, saw a picture of this t-shirt on pinterest (they both texted me pictures of it a day apart! We do that…see things on pinterest, take pictures of them on our iphones and text eachother!! haha)
Anyway…when I saw it I knew I had to have one for Owen!  I immediately followed the directions on pinterest and emailed to see if I was able to get one of these adorable shirts. A woman, named Pamela, created this t-shirt for her son and never ever thought it would be so popular or that he would end up all over pinterset!!   She told me via email that she was FLOODED with t-shirt orders, and directed me to her etsy shop…and thankfully took my order! 
I got the shirt yesterday and was dieing to get Owen in it and start taking pictures of him.  Its just so darn cute!

Unfortunately Pamela isn’t taking t-shirt orders (for the time being)…but you should definitely check out some of the other stuff at her etsy shop (click here) or some of her DYI projects at her blog (click here)…I was browsing both sites and once I get Baby #2’s room figured out I’m going to be making another order AND using her tips for painting stripes too!!

Thanks Pamela for an awesome shirt…great idea and we’ll hopefully be in touch in the future!!

ps.  Baby Souza is 11 weeks old in that ultrasound picture (7-20-2012)…and now at 12 weeks I’m starting to actually “look” prego (yes already!)

The ANNUAL Souza River Trip

Last year I gave the run down on our yearly family trips…so I don’t need to go into detail about how awesome they are, since I’m sure you just clicked on that link to read/refresh your memory…right?!? haha

No really this year’s trip was a HUGE success. The kids are all getting older now so the worrying of hydrating, eating, burning, etc are minimal. The “big kids”, Peyton and Bailey are actually getting to that funny age…the little things about the river aren’t as fun…playing in the sand for hours with a 3 year old just wasn’t enticing to them! heehee. So I suggested that we will just “have” to get a jetski or something to keep everyone entertained for years to come. haha I wish. But we had GREAT weather, GREAT company, a GREAT cove and…you guessed it…a GREAT time.

See that Baby Bump TOTALLY popping out already…crazy how quick it happened with this time around!!!

Papa & Mya with all 3 grandkids!

We spend the days on the water…relaxing, snacking and some of them were drinking…it was beautiful. We were at the river just 2 weeks prior and the water was very chilly then…but this trip it was perfect. My booty was in the water almost the whole time since it was toasty outside (111 degrees!)
 

After awesome days on the water, dinner, showers, etc. we walked to the Riverside hotel for the kids to have some fun at the arcade.  Owen LOVES the Ar-Cade (that’s how he pronounces it).  It was kinda cute to watch him circle that place a million times…play games and then actually get to pick prizes with his tickets (or the tickets his nice cousins gave him!).

It was a wonderful trip…love spending time with the family on the Souza Boat!

And I think this was the only picture I got of the 3 kids…like the whole time the fam was visiting..good thing it’s a good one.

July 26th

My mother is the most strong, reliable, genuine, loyal, funny person I know. I have referred to her many times as a rock…my rock for that matter! Yes she is my mother but she is truly my best friend as I have grown up! She’s not the woman that wore a blue security shirt while I was in high school (yes my mother was campus security at the high school I went to); which was actually cool EXCEPT when little bitchy girls would use my mom as a way to piss me off (even more!) haha. She is now the person I go to with anything…questions, concerns, advice, anything!  I’ve told my girlfriends many times “my mom knows everything!” haha. 

Many of you are friends with Mom on facebook and follow her hysterical posts that she does daily! Its her mission to make people smile everyday…and we all love her for that oh so much!  But…like every human Mom also has “down days”…and July 26th is one of them! July 26th, 2004 Mom was diagnosis with Breast Cancer…

This pic was taken in early August..the day after her lumpectomy.

And this was a few chemo treatments in…my lil bald hero!!

I think back to this time in my life…I had NO idea of the significance when Mom told me she had cancer…she did it over the phone while I was driving somewhere after work. She wanted to wait to tell me in person but I was persistent in NOT waiting to hear the news. But now as I look back I really didn’t “get it”…I never thought my mom could die…heck I left for Hawaii with Yosh and friends a few days after that (but returned before she had her surgery!…I was there for that!) Of course I never “got it” until I myself was diagnosed…and then I apologized to my mother for not understanding like I should have. I remember sitting in Dr. Chan’s office and telling her that I was sorry…I just didn’t get it! I don’t think anyone really does until it effects them personally somehow!  Anniversaries of being diagnosed are sad days…it brings you back to such a sad time…and yesterday I didn’t remember this day…I’m a horrible daughter!

And ON TOP of that…July 26th, 2008 is the day that Mom lost her father!  This day I knew…this day I remembered…and its just so weird that he passed away on the same day just 4 years later. 

This was taken in December 2007…6 months before he passed and it was the very last time I got to see my Grandpa!

This pic was taken the day of Grandpa’s funeral in July 2008 at the Foxford cemetery…!  See even in this picture Mom was being the strong rock for her sisters and Mother…the rock that SOOO many of us know!

So obviously Mom was down yesterday…and I feel horrible since I wasn’t there for her like she would have been for me! Instead of showing her some empathy, I got irritated with her over stupid antibiotics going in the fridge! Of course I texted and apologized to her…but Mom I’m sorry again!  We will have a nice relaxing girls day next Tuesday at Glen Ivy…and I’ll be your DD and show you some empathy heehee.  Love you Mom!!

Guess What??

I feel like I have been living a bit of a lie since we got home from the cruise….my thoughts have been consumed with the thought of another little baby is actually growing inside me..but haven’t been able to talk much about it. 

Many people knew that this day would be coming…feels like everyone and their mom knew that we were going to start trying for another baby once I was 2 years cancer free.  And of course…in February we got the “all clear” and the thoughts of actually trying for another baby were terrifyingly real. 
Back in 2009…the day I met with my oncologist, Dr. Chan, we talked about many many things…and one big one was the idea that potentially…the chemo COULD make me go into menopause, therefore ending our dreams of having more children. I remember Dr. Chan saying “do you have any children?” And of course I sat there with fully engorged breasts (since I had to stop breastfeeding abruptly upon being diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma only days prior) He said “Well you can at least be thankfully to have ONE baby”.   My heart (as well as Yosh’s) kinda sank at that comment…the thought of our lives with only one child was not something we thought about…we always knew we wanted more than one baby…we were actually hoping to have 3 little people some day.  At that moment I thought Dr. Chan was so heartless….but now…years later I understand. I am MORE than thankful for our 1 beautiful child…but of course prayed that chemo wouldn't rob something ELSE from me…the ability to have more babies!!  My OB/GYN thought giving me a Lupron shot during treatment could potentially save my ovaries…and make my eggs inactive during the treatments.  AND I’m happy and proud to say…my eggs and ovaries are working wonderfully….and we were able to conceive a baby! Whoohoo.

I’ve talked and blogged about our Caribbean Cruise, for what seems like forever. In many intoxicated conversation I had with people in the months leading up to the trip I told those that this cruise was a HUGE celebration…my 2 years cancer free, my 30th birthday, my Masters Degree Completion…AND this was a Baby Makin’ Cruise!!! haha My HUGE milestones for 2012….!!  Well…it was bittersweet when on the 3rd day on the cruise I found out…I wasn’t hangover…this was something else…

I was so excited…it happened so fast…waaaay too fast darnit! haha We were thankful to be pregnant BUT that meant Erin would be livin’ the sober dream while everyone else partied their booties off on this cruise!  Example #1…

Yes…that’s MY water…their fruity alcoholic drinks!! haha Cheers to Baby Souza…and having a Designated Walker to make sure everyone always finds their stateroom!! haha

Example #2…that’s a VIRGIN strawberry daiquiri…pathetic…but it was YUMMY!

Oddly enough I was totally ok with being sober while in the Caribbean…having a baby in my belly meant so much more than boozin’! But talk about luck…I wasn’t suppose to get pregnant the first month…what the heck! haha

And I think the Souza’s are setting a theme…back in 2008, also while on vacation in New York (visiting my sis-in-law and fam)…is when we found out about Baby #1 (Owen)…

So it only seems appropriate that we found out about baby #2 ALSO while on vacation! At least I go on vacation prepared with pregnancy tests!! haha

The excitement has recently REALLY set in. When we first found out I felt that I couldn’t let myself get too excited. I have seen a good few friends go through miscarriages…and I see how upsetting it can be. I knew that my chances of miscarrying would be higher than the average bear, since my little eggies have been through some sh*t.  Chemo isn’t exactly a “good thing” to put your ovaries and eggs through to produce babies!  So I feel like I have been holding my breath since June 4th..while docked in St. Thomas on that cruise ship…but on Thursday July 19th…I feel like I can breath again…

NO those aren’t three different babies…just my ONE baby…in 3 different pictures! Yosh was seriously sad there was only 1 baby in there…I wanted to throat punch him for even THINKING that! “IT” measured great…heart rate of 164…and pretty much fully developed. We got to see its little fingers, brain, legs…and healthy strong heart beatin’ away!  As Yosh and I drove home from Kaiser after seeing our little baby…I cried…it was a mix of emotions. I’m so super excited…but so super scared. I feel like the past few years have been tough on me…everything seems to be an uphill battle (medically speaking) and I just hope and pray that this little baby doesn’t fall victim to my shitty luck! I want this to go smoothly and for once just “be easy”.

I’ll be 12 weeks prego this week…1st trimester down…and a pot belly to already show it! I surely “popped” fast this time…but I guess that happens when you have a layer of chub on your belly to start with! haha This time around has been a bit harder on me than last time…thank heavens for being on summer break. I have been EXHAUSTED…and pretty nauseous whenever I eat. So hopefully that goes away by next week!!   I’m due Feb. 8th, yes I’ll be having a csection again, so that means baby will be coming at least 1 week early. Doc said that if I’m active like I was in my last pregnancy (which isn’t hard being a PE teacher AND this girl is NOT going to stop Zumba until I’m physically unable to do it anymore) the chances of this baby coming 3 weeks early like Owen did are high.  Since having the cancer she recommended that I get the genetic testing done with this pregnancy (something I didn’t do with my first pregnancy) AND…YES we ARE finding out the sex of this baby!!  I feel like we need to do that for Owen…he needs to be prepared for whats coming and I also feel that ALL three of us need that extra time to bond with the baby…and knowing the sex makes it easier to start the bonding process sooner (from what I can see of my friends…they seem to be able to bond with their fetus’ before they have sex organs! haha I don’t think I had that with Baby #1).  I’m hoping to “learn” how to love more than one baby…it seems weird to be able to love something else as much as I love Owen…almost impossible…but everyone tells me that when you see Baby #2 those thoughts are gone and you love both of them equally.

I am 1 of 6 ladies whom I know of that are due in Feb 2013…many haven’t “come out” yet...so I won’t start listing them off…BUT looks like we can practically start our own facebook page for all of us Mommies-to-be-Again! haha Thanks for all the kind words when I announced on FB…appreciate it..and YOU KNOW I’ll be updating throughout this pregnancy! haha

ps.  And during the “Wally” Surgery…many peeps were telling me to numb the pain with drugs or bottles of wine…BUT…I wasn’t able to do either. Had to tough the sh*t out drug free since I didn’t wanna risk my little peanut!!!

Family Time!

Since the summer of 2003, Yosh’s sister Missy, Husband Chris and kids Bailey and Peyton have come to California once (or sometimes twice) a year to visit.

This is the year I met the lil ones….
Peyton totally adored me back then…wanted nothing to do with Uncle John b/c he was a BOY (and it used to get to him so much)! They were just little babies…I think Peyton was only 2 and Bailey was 4…I think. And by the way, can anyone see Owen in Peyton…they are definitely related!!!
And its so weird to think that now we have our own little one…and Bailey and Peyton are totally the “big” ones! My nephew Bailey is now 14 and going into 9th grade…at 5’10”, size 13 shoe and a tri-athlete…golf, basketball and baseball! He played golf with the high schoolers last year and was #3 on the team…and with his average score of 44 he would have been Roosvelt’s #1 golfer (as an 8th grader!!).  My niece, Peyton is 11…going into 6th grade…gorgeous little lady and also a STUD on the basketball court! She also plays on teams with girls much older than her and still balls them up! I’m a proud Auntie…can’t you tell! They are my only “real” niece and nephew…and I love them so much!

They moved to upstate New York a few months before I met Yosh, and I know it was such a big change for the Souza Family. Yosh’s parents missed Missy, Chris and the kids so so so much! Since Missy is the only girl in the family, she is kinda like the golden child and she had the only grandchildren for quite a while as well…so the family misses them so much while they are away and just loves every minute while they are here visiting with us!!

Last year we got them twice…once in the summer and for Thanksgiving.  And we are hoping they are able to make it out again later in the year…we just love having familia around!!

Spending time in Redlands is awesome. Love watching the kids play…and grandparents gloat!

And of course…the first REAL day in California the New Yorkers wanted to hit the beach. The weather report on my lovely iphone said it was going to be cloudy and not too warm…BUT it ended up being a BEAUTIFUL day! And it was TOTALLY cute b/c Uncle John got to teach the kids how to surf…

I have no “surf lesson pics”…I was too busy watching my son play with this strange little boy who’s grandmother came over to me and asked if Owen would play with her grandson. It was very odd…and kinda uncomfortable. So I didn’t take my eyes off him that whole time.

But Peyton adores Owen…and he surely adores her too. Owen has her SPENT when it comes to playing…every second of the day he wants Peyton and Bailey playing with him! haha Its cute to watch.

Wonderful day at the beach…followed by an awesome evening!!!! I actually talked my sister-in-law (and niece) into joining us for some Zumba!! heehee. It was fun to watch Peyton get so uncomfortable watching old ladies shakin’ their naughty bits!! heehee. She’ll appreciate it one day…the fact that her fat Auntie can still drop it like its hot!

And mornings like this…are times that I wish we had more of!!! Owen squeezing RIGHT in between is cousins…heehee.

More to come…these peeps aren’t leaving anytime soon!! We have our “annual family river trip” coming up this week…and more summer fun before we head back to work. boohoo!

Who needs Barbie's?

Owen is at the age now where he plays with toys and does the commentary for each of them…kinda like how I used to when I was little playing with Barbie's…or when my brother was little and played with his G.I. Joes.  Its so cute to listen to him when he thinks that no one is paying attention.

Yeah we don’t have Barbie's in this house (but hopefully we will have some around here SOMEDAY!)…but we have the Scooby Doo toys that work the same way. In this “scene”  Fred and Daphne were searching for sea animals to help…which is what I have been told by my lovely 3 year old, is what the Octonauts do (Octonauts are a show from Disney Jr).  Its so cute to watch him and his imagination. This is definitely a super fun age…but also our most challenging. My perfect little child has moments where I swear a demon possess’ his body for minutes at a time! hahaha.  My Mother always says “Thank God he throws tantrums…NORMAL children do that!” haha Thanks Mom…I’m so glad he throws tantrums as well…really reassures me…uhhhhh….sure! haha

Other than the fits, attitude and tantrums…my child makes me laugh every single day…he brings a smile to our faces and I just sit back and think…I wish he can stay this cute, small and innocent forever. I don’t want him to be a teenager…ever. Any ideas on how to keep that from happening?!?  Anyone?