Its 2 whole years later…and I now feel like I can finally really talk about what we went through on our journey of kicking cancers ass!! …I was always a little scared to talk about it too much before the 2 year marker…didn’t want to jinx myself! But I’m going to write…like A LOT about what the past 2 years have been like for us…but it will have to wait for another day. When I’m not in a hurry to have a few celebratory drinks! heehee
I don’t want to have cancer again…not so quickly after beating it the first time. I’ve been terrified I wouldn’t make it to the 2 year milestone without a reoccurrence. I read everywhere and was told by doctors…after the 2 year marker your likelihood of a reoccurrence drops significantly…so that’s been my goal…2 years…remaining cancer free…and we’ve done it!!
It’s hard living fearfully; my oncologist says we shouldn’t live like that… we must live without holding back, even though he knows it’s totally natural for survivors to be in a constant state of paranoia. Thankfully he understands that because over the past 2 years every time I had a bump, lump, pain, bruise, anything…I swore that it was cancer…bruises equaled leukemia (extreme yes! I know)…everything just scared me, and he’d get my crazy emails or phone messages. Thankfully he’s pretty amazing and has a way of ALWAYS being calm, and communicates well and put me at ease everytime. You don’t read this Dr. Chan…but thank you…for everything. And thank you to the magical person who recommended me to him…Ashleigh your amazing!
Kinda weird how this hallway can make a person feel soooo sick! The smell of the basement in Kaiser has a permanent smell of chemo or sickness…or something I don’t know. The memories it holds are NOT good ones…and they stick in your brain…Mom even still feels it and shes been cancer free for 7 years now! Its weird. Whenever I see patients going in those doors I feel for them…I pray for them…and hope they stay strong and kick cancer’s ass like my mother and I both did!
Today I had my routine appointment with Dr. Chan…labs, chest x-ray all came back good and my physical exam “feel up” was good too. Only thing he mentioned was there was suspicious spot in my chest x-ray, not worried about it…just going to repeat the x-ray in 6 months. It’s pretty awesome. I remember being in that room 2 and a half years prior…scared to death…not sure what the future would hold. I remember Dr. Chan talking about the 2 year marker and me thinking it was soooo far away! But we’re there…finally made it. I honestly feel like I’m on top of the world. I won’t lie and say I’m completely carefree now…because I’m not BUT I feel like I can breathe again. Time to start planning our future without worrying deep down that cancer will come back and invade our lives like it did before. I’m taking control back…cancer won’t paralyze what I want to do, what we want to do as a family!
So Mother and I had to celebrate…and since we are creatures of routine we went to the same place we went after year 1 check-up….Kens Sushi!
After last years check-up!!
And after this years check-up! Added some wine this year…
Cheers everyone! To a long healthy HAPPY life.
Actually a friend left me the cutest comment on facebook today…I have to share. I love it! Thanks Buzz!
Buzz Baviello says Congrats & "Erin Go Bragh" Know it means "Ireland forever" but I'm saying it to mean Erin (stay Healthy) forever!!
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